'Twas the night before Christmas And all through New Pacifica, Not a single thing was happening At least, nothing specific, uh... (Couldn't help that one) (c:
The kids were upstairs all snuggled in bed, While visions of Kobas danced in their heads. With Devon in her nightie and Danz in whatever you think, Had just settled in for anything but a nap. (wink wink)
When from up on their roof there arose such a racket, Devon stopped to think, "I hope that's not Buddy Hackett." She jumped from the bed and ran to the window, And saw something that was giving off a weird reddish glow.
And what to her wondering eyes should lend her, But a huge Transrover, pulled by eight big Grendlers. And she spied a man at the reins who didn't look very tall, And she squinted and realized: Wait a minute! That's Gaal!!
She grabbed a big rifle and put Gaal in her sight, Then said, "I need a silencer to make this all right." She slipped on the silencer and took aim at the sleigh, This one that would bring them no joy Christmas Day.
Then all of a sudden a fat man appeared, And said, "Is this how Christmas is now revered? By killing and murdering even people like Gaal? It's a wonder that anyone's still alive at all."
"Give me that thing!", he called with a shout. She tossed it to him, and he blew Gaal's brains out. As she screamed in shock he said, "It's okay. I've been wanting to do that to him all damn day."
"Go on now, child, and tell the mass. I'm hear to pass candy canes and to kick some ass!!" And he took off like a bolt she thought he was quick, Then she knew in a moment it must be Saint Nick.
And Santa invaded the Earth-orbiting stations, And went and sought out the leaders of nations. The Council was still in session, deciding what to do to New Eden. Santa shot them all and made sure they kept bleedin'.
And as for Reilly, that evil old prick, Santa surprised him and cut off -- well, you know. And the folks on G889 laughed and cheered, For that was the end of the regime they all feared.
And as they thanked Santa for the end to the strife, He said, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good life! If you think that was neat, wait 'til next year! I'll hunt Reilly down again and cut off his ear!"
